The beginning of a new journey

Today is the eve of the beginning of a era for me. For the past 10 years I have been married, tonight 12pm I will no longer be married. Tomorrow as of 12:01 I will consider myself single after 11 years.
It feels surreal. I use to be very upset and anxious about this date, but not anymore.

I see this as the beginning of a new journey. The opportunity for me to take my lessons learned and put them to particle use. I separated on Aug 12th 2009, I filed for a divorce Dec 2011, it is now June 27th 2012 and I am single. I have experienced disappointments, heart ache, discovery, growth, and change. I am so blessed to see myself though to the end as a journey that has led to another bend in the road.

My life is wonderful I have experienced my serious of unfortunate events but through it all I am so happy on the other side of this.

There were plenty of times when I was not sure if I could breath another moment. There were times when I was not sure how I would pay my bills to buy food, there were even more days when I just couldn't think. And then I took responsibility for my actions, my self, my behaviors and my lack of behaviors.

I stopped hurting when I stopped feeling hurt. I stopped waiting on my happiness and I went out and found it. Happiness is within my reach so I stretched until I reached it.

Every day is yes. I wake up and choose yes or no. I keep it simple, yes or no. 

A chance meeting

I meet someone recently.. Or should I say he meet me ;)

He sent me a note that stated he was interested in me and I responded as I was interested in him. Now we begin the journey of discovery...

I realize now that in the past I was not honest with myself in the beginning and as I discovered more I liked less.

When the benefits outweighed the pain.. I left. I could have saved myself years with honesty.

I am being 100% honest and truthful with myself and him.
I have the capacity to love. I choose to love, I know how to love.

I want to love my mate with the unconditional love found in few relationships.
***** DISCLAIMER**** I AM IN NO WAY SUPPORTING UNDERAGE RELATIONSHIPS OR RELATIONSHIPS BETWEEN PERSONS OF RELATIONS***

As a mother I love my children with unfaltering dedication and support. I love them and would do all within my power to protect them. All decision I make are with them in mind and putting them first. I have been a mother for 18 years. I am good at this. I only know how to function like this.

What I recently learned though is putting me first is Putting them first. My health physically, mentally, physically, emotionally, financially, and spiritually all need to be balanced for me to be a smooth running machine.

I am taking those same principles and using them in my personal life. I know how to love unconditionally I do it all the time.

I know how to forgive and forget. I do it every day!

I know how to teach others how to treat me! I do it every day!

I know how to hold my temper, count my words, and play nice. I do it every day!

There are no excuses why I should not apply those same principles through out my entire life. Especially my personal/romantic/love arena.

Are you holding up your end of happiness?